Out and about in ZhengZhou

Ok, this is a post I meant to write on Tuesday after we went shopping at the Lotus center (large superstore) here in ZhengZhou. I'll do it now while I have a minute. :)

So on Tuesday, after making the adoptions all official, our wonderful guides loaded us up and took us to the Lotus center. This was part shopping trip, part cultural outing.  Let me take a moment here to talk about shopping. Those of you packing at home right now, let me repeat what you have already heard. YOU CAN BUY ANYTHING YOU NEED IN CHINA!!  PACK LIGHTER!!! Seriously. Pack only the minimal clothing you need and a few supplies to get you through the first 48 hours. You can buy it all here. For those coming to ZhengZhou, Henan, especially using CCAI, know that the street behind your hotel (Crowne Plaza) is full of little shops that sell everything. You can very easily get there on Sunday evening before you get your child on Monday. (Otherwise, they will get you formula on Monday afternoon and take you to the Lotus center on Tuesday afternoon.)

When I say everything, I mean everything. I saw diapers, formula, baby wipes (FYI, Chinese baby wipes are not as high quality. Bring one pack and save them for nasty stuff!), diaper rash cream, Johnson & Johnson baby care items, Tide detergent, sippy cups, baby bottles, pacifiers, thermos (for hot bottles), toys, clothes, diet coke, TONS of snacks many recognizable, snickers bars, and the list goes on! This was JUST the little shops down the street! At the Lotus center there was even more. I will say the clothes at the Lotus didn't impress me. There was almost nothing that fit Katie (12 months/18 months) that was not split pants. Plan accordingly.

Now the cultural part. First, let me be very clear. For the most part the Chinese people have been wonderful! Many go out of their way to be helpful even if that doesn't feel "helpful" to us like pointing out that we are freezing our babies and they will get sick! :) Some have very sweetly thanked us for adopting our children and loving them. But that isn't the only reaction and the second reaction reminds us clearly WHY we are even able to adopt these sweet babies.  As some of you may know, the Chinese culture is a direct one in the sense that staring, pointing, and taking photos of complete strangers is not considered rude. I know this. I know that many here in ZhengZhou have barely seen a Caucasian let alone one carrying a Chinese child! Then take that times 13! What a sight we are! I don't mind their stares. I barely notice. Maybe because I've been part of a transracial family for 3.5 years or maybe because I spent 21 years sticking out of a crowd like a sore thumb.

What has surprised me is my response to the negative interactions. It is hard for me to ignore these and blow them off as Chinese culture. Let me give you an example of what I am talking about. While waiting for the bus at the Lotus center, a travel mate and I were standing and talking while holding our daughters. Both our sweet children are cleft-affected. Her little one is young and does not yet have her lip repaired. We quickly draw a crowd, but some are pointing at our children's lips and laughing. Some touch other sweet babies in our group and then see their special need and pull away in disgust. It makes me angry... angry for my child and sad... but it does shows me what she would face here if she stayed. 

I don't write this to made the Chinese culture/people look bad. I write it so others will not be shocked at the experience or the emotions they feel in response.